{SCA} A fish is any aquatic vertebrate animal that is covered with scales, and equipped with two sets of paired fins and several unpaired fins.
Most fish are ectothermic (or cold-blooded). Fish are most abundant in bodies of water.
These new and best collection of fishing jokes text messages.
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1. Mexican Fisherman
The American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.
The Mexican replied, “Only a little while.”
The American then asked, “Why didn’t you stay out longer and catch more fish?”
The Mexican said, “With this I have more than enough to support my family’s needs.”
The American then asked, “But what do you do with the rest of your time?”
The Mexican fisherman said, “I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life.”
The American scoffed, “I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing; and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat: With the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats.
Eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor; eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then Los Angeles and eventually New York where you will run your ever-expanding enterprise.”
The Mexican fisherman asked, “But, how long will this all take?”
To which the American replied, “15 to 20 years.”
“But what then?” asked the Mexican.
The American laughed and said that’s the best part. “When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions.”
“Millions?…Then what?”
The American said, “Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siesta with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos.”
2. Ole and Sven went fishing
Ole and Sven went fishing one summer and decided to rent a boat from the resort instead of fishing from the shore. They rowed out a ways and started to fish. They caught one fish after the other.
Ole says to Sven, “I wish we could mark this spot. It’s the best fishing I’ve seen since I was a boy.”
Sven replied, “I got some chalk in my tackle box, so why don’t I put an X right here on the bottom of the boat?”
Ole laughed, “You goofy brother of mine…What if we don’t rent the same boat next time.”
3. Catfish Jokes
Q. What is the difference between a catfish and a lawyer?
A. One is a bottom-dwelling, scum-sucking scavenger and the other is a fish!
Q. What is the difference between a female lawyer and a catfish?
A. One’s slimy and has whiskers, and the other one lives in the water.
TRIVIA: The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds, that makes the catfish rank #1 for animal having the most taste buds.
Jim had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without catching a single one. On his way home, he stopped at the supermarket and ordered four catfish. He told the fish salesman, “Pick four large ones out and throw them at me, will you?”
“Why do you want me to throw them at you?”
“Because I want to tell my wife that I caught them.”
“Okay, but I suggest that you take the orange roughy.”
“But why?”
“Because your wife came in earlier today and said that if you came by, I
should tell you to take orange roughy. She prefers that for supper tonight.”